Top 10 Albums I Made Love To In 2013
01 - Speedy Ortiz - ”Major Arcana”
The big personal news of 2013 was that I finally lost my v card to a woman. She changed my whole world, like the scene where they sing about a whole new world in the film “Aladin”. I lost it while listening to this record and by some stroke of gentle luck it also happens to be my favorite record of the year. I also recently learned that this isn’t a band, but a supergroup made up by rich white men to sell me Topshop shirts but I don’t think it’s working. This record kind of sounds like Exile in Guyville. But doesn’t every record? Probably.
02 - Pity Sex - ”Feast of Love”
Pity Sex is one of those bands that doesn’t care what you think. Or maybe they do. Maybe it’s all they do. Look, I’m not a journalist. I don’t know what Pity Sex do but I have met them and they all seem like well rounded fully formed human beings with complex and beautiful understandings of the world. This record sounds good because the songs are good and they are well produced. It’s a simple recipe. This is the year I also got super into Brussels Sprouts.
03 - No Joy - Wait to Pleasure
No Joy are a band that seems tailor made to my musical interests. If there was a band member named Taylor i would say they were Taylor made and I would instantly regret it. Anyway, this band has nothing to do with me or my musical desires. The very notion that the band and it’s formation has anything to do with me just shows how grossly self involved I am. I know I used the qualifier “seems” but still. Also this season of Archer has been good.
04 - Grooms - Infinity Caller
Grooms is straight up my favorite band in Brooklyn. I have been a fan since their first record came out and they get a little better on each record. They are on an exact inverse trajectory of the past 5 weezer records.
05 - My Bloody Valentine - MBV
My understanding is that this is the first album this band has made in over 200 years. I can’t believe this album is good. How is it possible that something worked on for 200 years is good? Usually laboring over things makes things shitty. There are a lot more Star Wars Episode I’s and Chinese Democracies in the world than MBVs. Also this album has reverb with slight traces of guitar attached to it.
06 - Medicine - To The Happy Few
Everyone who reviewed the Medicine record really wanted to make sure no one compared it to the MBV record because they don’t think they are similar but i mean, come on. They kind of are. I mean, in the bubble of ambient 90’s sounding rock they might be on opposite ends of the spectrum but that whole spectrum is but a tiny bubble in the sea of music seltzer. It’s like that shirt that shows the Milky way and it says “you are here” but you can wear that shirt in Japan and it is just as accurate despite being quite far away in human miles as someone wearing it in “The Windy City”. Additionally, Human Miles is the name of my autobiography. Anyway this album is great.
07 - Widowspeak - Almanac
I respect Widowspeak. They made a record that sounds kind of like a 70’s americana record but only a little. You can hear crickets on the record cause their reverb tank was an old barn silo. That is pretty cool. If you don’t like crickets you are not a person that deserves love. Does anyone truly deserve love? Maybe. Probably. Yes.
08 - Foxygen - we are the 21st century
Like everyone who likes Foxygen I don’t actually know with 100% certainty that I love this record. I am leaning towards thinking i do but I am willing to also accept that I don’t. I have watched every episode of Walking Dead and I am pretty sure I hate that show. I like when people say that this album is retro or a throwback to make fun of them or put them down as if throwback or retro is somehow easier or less genuine than just using sounds that are considered current. Anyway you don’t even hear the difference between Evie Sands and The Andrews Sisters so go fuck yourself.
09 - Joanna Grusome - Weird Sister
I love liking bands with shitty band names because my band name is shitty and it makes me feel less alone. Anyway this band took CMJ by storm! All in a New York Minute! People were so into them at CMJ it was insane. I almost saw them twice but I slept instead. I bought the record though. Oh I paid for all these records that I have listed. I am a great person. I paid for most of them directly through the labels that put them out. I am somehow single.
10 - Fear of Men - Early Fragments
Fear of Men opened for us somehow in their first NYC show. I told (begged) the venue to let us play before them and they were like “that’s silly! They have not played here before! You are local” and I then had a month long panic attack but luckily people didn’t leave after them.
Other fantastic 2013 records:
Tancred - S/T, Youth Lagoon - Wonderous Bughouse, Swearin’ - Surfing Strange, Blouse - Imperium, Kurt Vile - Wakin’ on a Pretty Daze, Jenny o. - Auto mechanic, Laura Stevenson - Wheel, Potty Mouth - Hell Bent, Bleached - Ride Your Heart, Camp Counselors - Huntress, Neko Case - The Worse Things Get, Waxahatchee - Cerulean Salt,